Dating a man 16 years younger
twentysomething Peter Pans.” Putting this analysis in terms more familiar to his audience of BYU graduates and their families, Elder Tingey spoke of “the indecision some college graduates have in …
accepting the responsibilities of marriage and family.” This tendency to postpone adult responsibilities, including marriage and family, is surely visible among our Latter-day Saint young adults.
Gather your courage and look for someone to pair off with.
Start with a variety of dates with a variety of young women, and when that phase yields a good prospect, proceed to courtship. That is what the Lord intends for His young adult sons and daughters.
Hanging out consists of numbers of young men and young women joining together in some group activity. For the benefit of some of you who are not middle-aged or older, I also may need to describe what dating is. Dating is pairing off to experience the kind of one-on-one association and temporary commitment that can lead to marriage in some rare and treasured cases. I am not sure, but I can see some contributing factors: All of this made dating more difficult.
And the more elaborate and expensive the date, the fewer the dates.
Prepare yourself for life—even a single life—by education, experience, and planning. I am asking her to come up and tell us what is in her heart. I was married in my middle 50s, and I feel like I’m becoming the poster girl for “old.” Before I start, I feel to tell you how much you are loved by your Heavenly Father. Make it count by dedicating your time to your Heavenly Father. It is something that happens every day of our lives. It can be very painful to be single for such a long time, especially in a church of families. On my 50th birthday my brother-in-law was reading the newspaper. I would say to everyone in this room, always remember that your first calling is as a mother or as a father.
We are in Oakland, and I’ve just been to the visitors’ center across the way with President Robert Bauman of the mission. He said, “Hey, it says here in the paper that at age 50 your chances for getting killed by terrorists are better than your chances for getting married.” I knew that dating was tough when he said that, but don’t give up. Develop those domestic talents, talents of love and talents of service.
It has been replaced by something called “hanging out.” You young people apparently know what this is, but I will describe it for the benefit of those of us who are middle-aged or older and otherwise uninformed.
If you do this, you should also hang up a sign, “Will open for individual dates,” or something like that.
And, young women, please make it easier for these shy males to ask for a simple, inexpensive date.
Finally, young women, if you turn down a date, be kind.
Otherwise you may crush a nervous and shy questioner and destroy him as a potential dater, and that could hurt some other sister.
As dates become fewer and more elaborate, this seems to create an expectation that a date implies seriousness or continuing commitment. Gone is the clumsy and inexpensive phone call your parents and grandparents and I used to make. ” Cheap dates like that can be frequent and nonthreatening, since they don’t seem to imply a continuing commitment.