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‘In Orlando, a cab driver accidentally walked on stage during the show so we let him perform and he ended up winning,’ he adds. There’s only one way to truly understand what goes down (and up, and down, and up again) at the Air Sex Championships, and that’s to take part.

Like all good competitive sporting sex spectacles, the Air Sex Championship has a couple of rules to which all participants must adhere. Competitors may bump, grind and hump every which way, just as long as they don’t ejaculate on the stage. The second rule, as one might expect from an air sex competition, is that the object of the competitor’s lust must be invisible. Sadly the darn airfare proved a tad too dear for this journalist, so I did the next best thing and talked to a previous winner.

In the act that won me the championship, I am an old lady who jerks off men and collects their semen to use as a fountain of youth cream. I knew I had to do something a bit out there to get the judges’ attention and that story seemed simple but bold. The crowd numbered over a thousand people and as much as we’re up there having fun, and having air sex, it’s still dirty.

I like the idea of elderly ladies still getting their rocks off in a hardcore way; you don’t have to shrivel up and lose all sex drive over a certain age. I knew the crowd was going to see the faces I make, and the way my body jiggles that only a few (OK, more than a few) people have seen in private.

Roxy Castillo was crowned 2015 Fun Fun Fun Fest Champion, going on to compete for the national title and again in 2016.

She dishes the dirt on the dirtiest sporting-come-art-come-comedy-come-pretend-cum event out there, and explains what it takes to become an Air Sex Champion.

Imagine a cross between air guitar and charades when the movie you are acting out is Nymphomaniac; you have just imagined the Air Sex Championship, the sex-themed phenomenon taking America by storm.

Now in its ninth year, the Air Sex Championships is the USA’s premium – and almost certainly only – sex miming road show.

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Update Star has been tested to meet all of the technical requirements to be compatible with Windows 10, 8.1, Windows 8, Windows 7, Windows Vista, Windows Server 2003, 2008, and Windows XP, 32 bit and 64 bit editions.

It’s almost impossible to believe there are so many ways to have imaginary sex – and Trew has seen practically all of them.

One of his most memorable moments was when a mother and son competed in the same show (the mother ended up winning).

Billed as a cross between sports, art and comedy, participants take to the stage and perform their best sex moves on absolutely no one.

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Some competitors are fully clothed, others are in various states of undress, but no one is naked, which is perhaps a blessing.

For decades he was the pipe-smoking, silk-pajama-wearing center of a constant party with celebrities and Playboy models.